Whether or not you’re into weird fusion of rock, pop, jazz, orchestral music, and musique concrète, it cannot be disputed that American guitarist, composer, and bandleader Frank Zappa was a genuine musical genius. His legacy, comprising 60-plus albums released with THE MOTHERS OF INVENTION and as a solo artist, is characterized by experimentation, musical virtuosity, and satire of American culture. If there ever was one album to distillate everything that made his music so unique, it would be the fourteenth album he made with THE MOTHERS OF INVENTION, the twentieth Zappa installment overall, entitled “One Size Fits All” and released on June 25 th, 1975, via DiscReet and distributed by Warner Bros. Early US pressings of the LP had the catalog number “BS 2879” inscribed and crossed out in the runoff matrix, indicating that at one point “One Size Fits All” was planned for release on the Warner Bros. label. Perhaps the music and humor on the album were too much for the label, although this endeavor was one of the more serious Zappa albums of the era, emphasizing the jazz-fusion instrumentalism rather than his signature scatological humor. The album features the second incarnation of THE MOTHERS OF INVENTION, perhaps the most iconic lineup Zappa ever had, and most of the songs are reckless forays into rhythmically intricate sonic labyrinths that still somehow adhere to the relatively simple rock paradigm of the 1970s. Legend has it that Zappa himself was particularly proud of this album, albeit he complained bitterly to fans about the lack of promotion given to it by Warner Bros. Records. Nonetheless, 50 years later, the album stands as one of his most revered classics – a monolith, if you will. While this album might not be the easiest point of entry to the weird world of Frank Zappa, it is by far one of the best to start wading through his ocean-sized musical corpus.
The opener, “Inca Roads,” is one of Zappa‘s most complex compositions. Well, the lyrics play with the idea of alien stereotypes meddling with the Incan civilization; so, in order to drive the Dadaist point home properly, the music needs to be quite unusual, too, I guess. While the song is a high-octane demonstration of the musical virtuosity of the whole band, “Inca Roads” is a tour de force of percussionist Ruth Underwood, in particular. Even the lyrics acknowledge this as the ending goes, “On Ruth, on Ruth, that’s Ruth!” What makes the song even more baffling is the fact that the basic instrument tracks originated from a live TV recording at the KCET Studios in Los Angeles on August 27, 1974, apart from the guitar solos, which were lifted from a concert recorded in Helsinki, Finland, in September 1974. I reckon it was the same show that gave us the Zappafied, prima vista version of the Finnish tango classic, “Satumaa,” originally composed by Unto Mononen. In 2018, Prog magazine nominated the song at the hundredth position in the 100 Greatest Prog Songs of All Time list. “One Size Fits All” was the last album to boast Zappa‘s jazz-fusion tendencies with such reckless abandon for some time to come, and “Inca Roads” alone is worth salvaging the album from the dusty crates of those dubious second-hand record stores.
Two songs on the album – “Can’t Afford No Shoes” and “San Berd’ino” – are rather remarkable in that they showcase Zappa‘s chops at the fretless guitar. For a Zappa song, the former is pretty basic mid-1970s boogie with a heroic dose of silly humor. The latter, in turn, is a tight, bluesy funk piece. Those parts that sound like slide guitar licks are Zappa having a go at the fretless. Outside “One Size Fits All,” there is only one instance (as far as I know) when he plays the instrument – on “The Torture Never Stops” on “Zoot Allures” (1976). Zappa‘s unique and proficient guitar playing is quite often overlooked in favor of his compositional skills, but he sure knew how to make the guitar sing. And speaking of guitarists, one of Zappa‘s musical heroes, Johnny “Guitar” Watson, appears on two tracks, contributing the flambé vocals on the out-choruses of “San Berd’ino” and “Andy,” a song that sounds like the 1970s version of HAKEN.
Halfway into the album, “Evelyn, A Modified Dog” is a 1-minute interlude of sorts, serving as a breather in the middle. It is rather peculiar how Zappa manages to inject his signature quirks into such a minimalist song, too – namely, the weird time signatures and nonsense lyrics, delivered in Zappa‘s overpowering, overly theatrical style.
The songs, “Sofa No.1” and “Sofa No.2,” are an intriguing pair, or a 2-part suite, if you will. The album cover features a huge sofa floating in space and, interestingly, the album title’s initials – “OSFA” – could be rearranged to spell “SOFA.” The first part of the suite is instrumental, whereas the second features vocals in both German and English. Perhaps, the latter is a lieder parody? Whatever the case, the vocal version was released as a single in Germany, referred to as “Du bist mein Sofa.” From the perspective of a Finnish metalhead, this seems rather interesting, as many Finnish metal acts have also conquered the country with tongue-in-cheek humor. Later, the instrumental popped up as guitar luminary and Zappa alumnus Stevie Vai contributed his cover rendition of the song to the tribute album, “Zappa’s Universe,” in 1993, the year Zappa died.
Of course, this endeavor would not be a genuine Zappa album without a diabolically groovy rock’n’roll cabaret with a lengthy solo section. In “Po-Jama People,” the guitar solo takes up more than half of the song, but I reckon, no one really minds because the lyrics are, once again, downright silly. Then, “Florentine Pogen” is yet another baffling banger with nonsensical lyrics, this time about some rich and filthy inhabitant of Florence – or, maybe, Swedish, praline-style cookies, who knows? Musically, the song harkens back to the early-1970s Zappa monoliths, such as “Grand Wazoo” (1972), and the jaw-dropping live double feature, “Roxy & Elsewhere” (1974). This song is the portfolio piece of both Napoleon Murphy Brock and George Duke on vocals; it sounds almost as though EARTH, WIND & FIRE suddenly had a toilet-humor seizure.
In conclusion, “One Size Fits All” was the last official studio album Frank Zappa did with THE MOTHERS OF INVENTION, and it proved to be the best. The album is one of those “Best of Both Worlds” efforts, catering to the fans of both the jazzier side of Zappa and the bluesy Dadaism of his. The musical dexterity of his band is out of the world on this album, once again; Chester Thompson plays the drums like a funky little clockwork, Ruth Underwood is an absolute killer with her vibes and marimbas, George Duke is right up there in the pantheon of prog divinities, such as Keith Emerson, or fusion jazz giants, such as Chick Corea. The rest of the band does not pale in comparison. This album perfectly sums up what Frank Zappa was all about in the 1970s, the era that spawned some of his best work, in my opinion. It would be impossible to pick my favorite Zappa record because he made so many banging albums in the 1970s; “One Size Fits All” would be quite near the top, for sure.
Written by Jani Lehtinen
Tracklist
- Inca Roads
- Can’t Afford No Shoes
- Sofa No. 1
- Po-Jama People
- Florentine Pogen
- Evelyn, A Modified Dog
- San Ber’dino
- Andy
- Sofa No. 2
Lineup
Frank Zappa – guitars, vocals
George Duke – keyboards, synths, vocals
Napoleon Murphy Brock – flute, tenor sax, vocals
Ruth Underwood – marimba, vibraphone, percussion
Chester Thompson – drums, sound effects, voices
Tom Fowler – bass (all but track 2)
James “Bird Legs” Youman – bass on track 2
Johnny “Guitar” Watson – vocals on tracks 7 and 8
Captain Beefheart (credited as “Bloodshot Rollin’ Red”) – harmonica on track 7
Label
DiscReet
